Self-Doubt is a Powerful Force
Self-doubt has the power to overwhelm you and keep you stuck.
But how many times have you attempted to conquer self-doubt for good, only to have it creep back in each time you’re facing a new challenge?
Eckhart Tolle says, “Whatever you fight you strengthen.”
Battling self-doubt with relentless positivity is only serving to strengthen it.
Self-doubt becomes an overwhelmingly negative experience that imposes unrealistically high expectations upon you and stops you expressing your true voice. You end up feeling in constant competition with everyone around you and that you have to work that bit harder to just to be on a level.
The result is a self-defeating and exhausting cycle of feeling held back and striving for more, maybe even losing a little bit more of yourself each time you try to overcome it.
There is another way.
Eckhart Tolle also says, “Whatever you expose to the light becomes the light.”
When you learn to embrace self-doubt and bring it into the light, you give it permission to take a role in your life. Self-doubt can become a powerful ally, a motivational force and a solid route to meaningful and sustainable growth.
What others have said
These are a selection of the responses from clients who have worked through the coaching model to give self-doubt a purpose in their lives.
CONSIDERING THE SITUATION WE EXPLORED, WHAT EMOTIONS ARE NOW CONNECTED WITH THIS FOR YOU?
“Although uncomfortable, I feel more compassion and more trust.”
“Less anxiety, more calm And ordered thoughts. Less negativity and happier.”
“Patience, understanding, empathy.”
“Excitement. Movement. Force.”
“Positive. Feeling lighter. I have now a torch I can switch on and off if I want to…”
“More confident, feel sturdier/stronger/clearer about how I can differentiate myself, feel excited.”
“Fearless, excited, supported, connected, hope, gratitude.”
“Glad, happy, grateful.”
“Strength, energy, sadness, pain, opportunity, hope, contributing, love, drive.”
“Less tension in the body, more peace of mind, delicate awareness of my fragility, lighter.”
What thoughts are now connected with this situation?
“I feel more positive about my relationship with self-doubt. I feel like I’m more curious and inclined to explore my self-doubt.”
“Pragmatic use of the self-doubt to work on areas of development. Other people are preoccupied with their own thoughts and feelings.”
“There’s no rush. It’s okay. Take your time. You’re considerate and taking this seriously because it means a lot to you. In time you’ll reach the right decision for you.”
“I can now think about it differently. I now have different perspectives. I know that it can be a positive experience to be there. Self-doubt has its purpose and I can go and look underneath”
“Self-doubt is my friend. Opportunities lie ahead. This does not control me. I am more than this. Inner happiness is available to me. This feeling of discomfort is only here to show me it’s time for more growth. I can become comfortable with times of discomfort.”
“I feel affirmed with a sense of accomplishment and contentment. I am more confident about my ability to pilot positive change. Increased sense of empowerment and control. Greater ability to move towards my imagined future. To reach my goals and be more effective.”
“Clarity of the space of ambiguity. It is a legitimate and useful space to be in a zone of self-doubt.”
What did you learn about yourself by exploring self-doubt in this way?
“I learned to think about practical ways to have a deeper connection with what is important to me.”
“I learned a lot. I learned there was a lot of impatience and frustration that I connected to self-doubt. I learned there are also judgements that I make of other people that create isolation for myself. That I crave human connection, and that this nourishes me. I learned that self-doubt needn’t be something to battle, but can be a safe space in which to reflect and relax.”
“The need to look after myself.”
“I have seen that I have strengths. I like the image of the tree swaying but I cannot be unrooted. I like the power coming through me to open up.”
“I am a lot stronger than I ever believed I was. It has made me curious about what more I’m capable of. Discovering I am a really driven person…and that’s OK. I am capable of not feeling total dread thinking about the words self-doubt, I now feel curious about what it’s trying to show or tell me.”
“I learned that being in the present moment with self-doubt is something I have so far avoided. And that this represents a growth opportunity for me.”
“I do not include myself, which does not then allow me to value myself, or honour the internal ambiguous space needed.”
What did you enjoy most about our work together?
“I really enjoyed the path based on this coaching model. It gave me an opportunity to show more curiosity, more trust in the process and to connect the dots in my mind.”
“Clarity and a fresh perspective.”
“Having the time and you creating the space for me to struggle through it.”
“I really enjoyed your reflections and observations. Your contribution that perhaps self-doubt is there when the subject in question is something I care about was a wonderful re-frame. It’s made me more patient and compassionate towards self-doubt.”
“Honesty. I enjoy having and see a quick turnaround with positive thoughts. I enjoy being able to express myself with metaphors . I came out with powerful images to remember.”
“I enjoyed the gentle way you guided the sessions. The best coaching is understated and reflective. You created the context for insights and motivation to occur.”
“Noticing my self-awareness increase as I spoke out loud.”